We have all been there... Parenting doesn’t come with a handbook and even if it did, we would all find a way to deviate from it. I have learned many lessons from parenthood. Children test every flaw that you have and even some that you had no idea were hiding inside of you. I have never loved anything so much that I wanted to run away out of fear of ruining it! Running multiple businesses and being a single mother is harder than jumping out of plane for the first time. I use to beat myself up (and still do from time to time) about not being a perfect parent and I realized my biggest flaw as a parent was highlighting my flaws and not acknowledging my strengths. I was too busy trying to fix my flaws that I forgot that I was teaching my child to only focus on her weaknesses.
Now there have been times that I have yelled a little too much, lacked patience, worked too much, lacked focus and all of those things are human nature and yes I apologize to my 4 year old if I feel like my emotions got the best of me or I was projecting my pain onto her.
These beautiful human traits are not anything to be ashamed of. We go through life trying to fix our flaws to create this perfect person that we have idealized in our heads. I believe that is the biggest mistake you can make as a person and a parent. I want to teach my child how to love herself UNCONDITIONALLY.